The causes of tardiness can be understood and helped by considering a few underlying issues.  One of those is rationalizing your behavior.  For instance, a person who is late may blame others or minimize the impact of their lateness (Gee, I was only 15 minutes late, why are you so  angry, what’s the big deal anyway?). Rationalizing prevents us from seeing the reality of the situation and therefore prevents us from making changes.

We so often blame others for what we feel or why we react the way we do.  The truth is we are constantly choosing our own options, both positive and negative, along the way.  Look within and ask yourself, “Why did I choose that, what are my other options, and what can I do that will bring inner peace?”  You are responsible.  You may not be responsible for what has happened to you, but you are responsible for how you feel and how you choose to react to it.

Couples counseling can enhance your relationship by learning skills such as effective communication, conflict resolution, assertiveness, intimacy, and time management.  Couples counseling can also help to reveal the obstacles that block the development of a deeper sense of intimacy between you.  Couples can learn to move into the stage of deeper sharing and more fulfillment in their relationships. 

Each of us enters into romantic relationships never believing that they could turn abusive or unhealthy. It is inevitable that there will be times of sadness, tension, or outright anger between you and your partner. Disagreements in a relationship are not only normal but, if constructively resolved, actually strengthen the relationship.

Today many people are facing stressors that have reached a new level of intensity.

Gone are the days of dealing with just work related stress or relationship tension.  Now more and more people are facing the extreme circumstances related to layoffs, foreclosures and bankruptcy.  Even if its not happening to you directly, you may still be feeling the stress of having it happen around you and not knowing where it will all lead. 

Major Depression occurs when feelings of extreme sadness or despair last for at least two weeks or longer and when they interfere with daily living such as social and working activities, sleeping, appetite, and energy.  Depressed individuals tend to feel helpless and hopeless and some may have thoughts of death or suicide.

In therapy, you are supposed to get helpful information from someone who does not have an emotional stake in the outcome.  Your therapist should not be confused with your best friend.  You need to work with someone who does not foster dependence but rather helps you learn how to trust yourself to ask and answer difficult questions to find what works for you.  

What can families do to emerge stronger than ever during these difficult financial times?  The families that tend to do best discuss their problems openly and work together to find solutions.   

The longer I work in this field, the more I believe that good therapy should consist of a few basic essentials. 

A strong relationship, a clear and honest dialogue, a safe place for experiencing strong emotion, time to reflect in depth and challenge old beliefs, insight into patterns and dynamics, the ability to tolerate frustration to work through the discomfort of change (yes, even good change can be uncomfortable at first), a strong focus on appropriate goals, and a place where personal responsibility is encouraged and dependency is discouraged.